iGoogle

Don't know if anyone out there also uses iGoogle, but they just made some layout changes that really suck. Tabs used to be on the top -- now they're on the left side, totally screwing up my gadgets. And it's not an option, they're just there.

If you use iGoogle and are also unhappy with the changes, a petition has been started and can be accessed here http://www.petitiononline.com/igoogle/petition.html
Can't be certain Google will pay attention, but I would think that the more people who complain, the more likely they are to pay heed and hopefully make the requested changes.

Ok. So you can see I haven't been posting all that much lately (hah -- hardly at all).

But, thanks to Google I am able to keep up with all my favorite blogs. I can take a brief break while at work and read them in the Google Reader. Only problem is... I can't comment :(
OK, I probably could, but that would require actually going to the blog which then has a possibility of showing up in my computer history (I'm at work, remember). So... I don't risk it. I make notes of posts I want to go back to so I can comment, but by the time I leave work, go to the gym, make sure the kids are fed and then in bed, I'm too exhausted to get on line.
Point is, I am still here and avidly enjoying all of you out there who do manage to get regular posts and comments in. I'm feeling like a major lurker (bad, bad, bad) when that's really not what I like or want to be.

Very little beyond TV and sleep is happening in our bedroom lately. And the TV watching is pretty much controlled by DH. Damn sports. And the moment one sports season finally ends, another 1 (or 2) pops up to take it's place. 3 out of 4 of DH's preferred baseball teams are out, greatly reducing the number of games he may want to see, but I know we'll be watching 'til the end. And now football and basketball are starting up. DH isn't so much into football, but if the local team is playing, we're watching. And basketball? That's the very first sport he got hooked on -- LA Lakers. And he still watches that like crazy. Only good thing when he travels is that I finally get to watch what I want. :D

Speaking of DH and travels. He's home this week but leaves Sunday for Russia and then France. And just in time for his parents to arrive. I'm stressing already. They're nice people but there are some major cultural and language gaps. Hopefully relatives in the area will help keep them entertained while I'm working.

And work -- I have 10 unpaid furlough days I have to take between now and the end of the year. YEAH to no work, BOO to no pay and no decrease in workload, just fewer days to use it. And they're taking money from me every pay period whether I take days off or not. So 10 furlough days, 1 vacation day, 2 floater holidays, and 2 freebies to take in the next 3 months. My hope is that on some of these days off I can catch up not only with some household things I've been putting off, but also with the blogosphere (reading, writing, commenting, etc.). I plan to start by using one of my freebies tomorrow -- DH is taking the day off and the kids are in school; I'm really hoping for some quality time *wink, wink, grin*

Hmmmmm... can't think of anything else to jot down right now.... maybe later...

Cravings

Why is it that the moment you can't have something, you want it more than anything else? You think about it, dream about it, fantasize about it, see it everywhere...

And, yes, I'm talking sex (and spankings) here. Although it does apply just as well to chocolate :)

So, DH and I are still struggling to get back in sync. Had some nice times last weekend, but we're not back like we were a while ago. DH is off travelling again this week (unavailable) -- and I've been sooooo horny. It's driving me nuts!

Now, I can of course *cough* take care of myself :D But's just not the same as being with that special someone, pleasuring and being pleasured.

And it's not only while I'm home that I'm feeling this way. It's like I'm in a constant state of arousal -- when I get up, while I'm commuting, while at work, after the gym (ok, for some reason, working out really works me up, the endorphins fuel the hormones, or something). And naughty girl that I am, I don't always wait 'til I'm home, locked in my bedroom, before I scratch the itch. And I know I'm not the only one who sneaks away into the bathroom at work, or finds a secluded parking place, or even indulges while driving (a woman called the radio station day and admitted it).

DH gets home this evening. Not sure what the weekend holds, between travel exhaustion (him), work exhaustion (me), baseball games (him), laundry (me)... Hopefully we'll find the time and energy to fully enjoy each other.

100

Well, I finally did it -- 100 posts! Whoo hoo!

And in all the work craziness I managed to completely miss my 1 year blogiversary, way back in July.

And look at my stat counter -- up over 40,000.

Wow. So much has happened in one year and 100 posts -- the good, the bad, the downright ugly; trials, tribulations and triumphs.

Well, here's to 100 more posts, another year of blogging an 40,000 more "hits". Thank you for staying with me so far, and I hope you continue to keep me company.

My Own Spanking Story

Go here and get your very own story...

I love the messages that pop up even before the story:

"Robin Michelle! You've been buying books? You're in for it now, naughty girl!"

"A good panties-down spanking with the bathbrush, that's what you'll be getting!"

Robin Gets Herself a Spanking
Robin was in trouble and she knew it. She wondered if DH would spank her right away or make her wait. ''Waiting is the worst!'' she thought, though in this case maybe it would be better to put it off... She didn't need to speculate, though, she'd know soon enough - she could hear a man's footsteps approaching the door. As she watched, the handle turned with what seemed like an unnatural slowness. An icy hand gripped her right in the middle of her bottom.
''Act natural,'' she told herself, which only caused her to give a nervous giggle just as her husband walked in.
''What's wrong?'' DH asked immediately.
''Me? Nothing! Why do you ask?''
''Just that you have a strange look on your face.'' So much for ''natural,'' Robin thought. DH continued. ''Okay, what have you done?''
''Um... nothing?''
''Robin...''
''Yes, DH?''
''Come on, out with it. Now.'' He had never been all that patient in these situations and was already heading toward the bedroom. Robin hurried to head him off.
''It's nothing, honest. It's just that... Well, I...'' Try as she might, she couldn't think of a way to make it sound any better.
''went to the bookstore and bought more books I didn't really need,'' she said with a rush. DH stopped in his tracks, slowly turning to look at her.
''Robin Michelle! It's nothing, honest?'' he mocked in a voice of disbelief. ''It doesn't sound like nothing. It sounds a lot like buying books.'' Robin felt herself tighten at that words - it had unfortunate connotations - unfortunate for her and unfortunate for her bottom. ''We've talked about buying books, haven't we?'' DH's speech went on. ''We have a way of dealing with buying books, don't we, naughty girl?'' Every time he used the term ''buying books'' he might as well be saying ''spanking,'' she thought. ''Robin Michelle, you do know how we deal with buying books, don't you?'' Instinctively Robin's hands shot back to cover her bottom, in a way answering DH's question very clearly. Though that's not the answer her voice gave.
''Well, I know... but... I thought... maybe this time...
''You thought maybe this time what, naughty girl? That you wouldn't be spanked? That buying books wouldn't get you a good bare-bottomed spanking?''
Robin didn't want a spanking - DH's spankings hurt! While she was getting them they stung like mad - she was always convinced she just had to get away and never could - and they left her so sore! Not just sore, very sore - sore like when you sit down a long time later you can still feel it like you just got it, that kind of sore. And she certainly didn't want one of those - especially not on her bare bottom!
And that was exactly how her husband was going to spank her - over his knee, her head down, jeans off, bottom up, panties down, bottom bare, her pale skin inviting his stern reproval! DH had never once let her keep her panties up. Quickly Robin's mind raced to remember what panties she'd put on, thankful that her black lace ones wouldn't add any to her embarrassment - having her bottom bared was embarrassing enough as it was!
Part of her wanted to run and hide, but most of her simply followed DH into the bedroom - the bedroom, where she was always taken to be spanked. Much as she hated getting a spanking, especially one of DH's spankings, she really did dislike buying more books when she already had so many, and really wished she could stop doing it. If having her husband spank her would stop her from buying books, maybe that was a good thing - if only it didn't have to be such a spanking!
Once in the bedroom, DH looked at her sternly as he sat on the bed, extending his legs as her soon-to-be ''resting'' place. My God, already? Robin thought to herself, but DH, instead of immediately motioning her over his lap and into place, clasped a hand on each of her arms.
''Now , I want to be fair about this, you know that, I hope. You should also know that I'm disappointed to hear about your buying books.'' Robin's spirits sunk even lower, though for a new reason now. She didn't like to disappoint DH. ''Very,'' he added. Maybe she really did deserve a spanking. ''I want you to tell me how this happened,'' he concluded. She tried to bow her head but with a gentle touch he raised her chin and made her look him in the eye.
''I don't know...'' was all she could think of to tell him. It would take too long to explain and not do any good anyway - but he wasn't about to settle for that.
''This buying books of yours, it must have had some reason. It didn't just happen, now did it? And I want you to tell me how or why it did.'' His face hardened even further. ''And you are going to tell me.''
''It's like this - I'm a bookophile/readaholic. I see a book that sounds interesting and I just have to have it.''
''I see. Robin?''
''Yes, DH?''
''Did I just hear anything that would keep me from giving you a spanking? Anything that would discourage me from giving you each and every swat of the spanking you've earned?''
''I don't know... maybe...'' she replied sullenly.
''Robin Michelle.''
''No. I guess not...''
''No. Nothing I heard dissuades me in the least. You, naughty girl, have behaved yourself into a panties-down spanking and now you are going to get it.''
Fighting off thoughts of how soon DH would have her pale skin bare and blushing, Robin moved hesitantly to her husband's side and was a little surprised when he didn't immediately pull her over his waiting lap. Glancing up at his stern face, her surprise turned to dismay and she felt her stomach tighten.
''Oh no,'' she said softly, hopelessly.
''Oh yes,'' came his reply. ''You know better.''
''No, really - please? I don't need that... do I?'' This last was no more than a whisper.
''You need to learn, and the bathbrush helps you learn. Don't make me waste my time - spanking you by hand has never changed a thing.
''Go,'' DH demanded and commanded.
Reluctantly - very reluctantly - Robin trudged off to get the bathbrush. Retrieving it from his bedside table, she took just a tiny moment to feel both its unfeeling wood and her own twinge of rebelliousness - ooo, to throw it, hide it, destroy it! Now that would be satisfying! Instead, the bathbrush would have its satisfaction on her, heating, punishing, scalding her poor helpless bottom. And if she ever did manage to do away with it, Robin had no doubt that DH would produce something even worse to deal with her current infraction and that additional one as well!
Shaking herself free of such imaginings, Robin and her thoughts returned to the bedroom and her husband's side, meekly proffering the demanded and dreaded bathbrush, knowing full well that in mere moments it would be blistering her bottom, and thoroughly. Her poor little bottom! What did it ever do? It wasn't the one that had a problem with buying books, she was. Why should it have to suffer? It just wasn't fair!
Oblivious to these objections, DH still sat like a deity on the bed, waiting to tumble her over his unforgiving thighs. As he reached to take the bathbrush from her, she pulled it back slightly.
''You'll start slowly, won't you?'' She knew she wasn't supposed to ask and he always replied with ''Is that what you deserve, naughty girl?'' But this once DH just took the bathbrush from her and nodded sympathetically.
Seeing his reaction Robin realized that she must be in even more trouble than she imagined. Her whole body stiffened and shook and she couldn't keep herself from turning and trying to run away - but DH was too quick for her, he'd grabbed her wrist even as the bathbrush left her hand. Before she knew it she was over his knee and the blood was rushing to her head.
Spank! He began immediately - spank spank spank spank spank!
''Ow! Oh! Wait!'' No matter how much time DH would take leading up to it, the first swat always startled her. Alternating stiffening and squirming, she quickly sunk into place as her husband jostled her for a better and steadier grip.
Spank spank spank - spank spank spank spank! spank! spank! spank! spank!
''Ow! No! Too hard!'' Robin protested, though really her jeans muffled the effect considerably - nearly all of this pain was caused by her own tension and apprehension. So far!
Spank spank spank spank! spank! spank!
''Ow ow ow!'' she continued, only to have DH chastise her further.
''Settle down, naughty girl - we haven't even started. I''m just getting you settled in. You can't even feel anything through your jeans.''
Spank spank spank! spank spank! spank spank!
''No, no! I feel it! I do! don't!'' Robin insisted somewhat nonsensically - the chance that he would stop already was non-existent.
''Shall I stop already? I thought I was doing this for you - you do know what's next, don't you?''
Ah - here was the dilemma upon whose horns Robin lay. To be spanked over her jeans, and therefore longer - or to shorten it a little and jump right to ''pants-down''? Or even panties-down? She made the same coward's choice she always had before.
Spank spank spank spank - spank spank spank! spank spank!
''No, no - that's okay,'' she decided immediately, and having done so found that this phase was much more tolerable. Maybe by the time he gets to my bare bottom I'll be ready, Robin thought. Right. And maybe his arm will wear out first - or I'll just fly to the moon!
Spank spank spank - spank spank spank spank! spank! spank! spank! spank!
''Owww. Owwwwww,'' Robin moaned softly, concluding that some sort of reaction was still in her favor. ''Hey! Wait!'' For no sooner had she resigned herself to an over-the-jeans spanking than the jeans-spanking was over! ''Stop! Not yet!''
''Oh?'' Spank spank spank spank!!! ''Haven't had enough yet? I thought you were in a hurry!'' Spank spank spank spank!!! Robin's husband saw to it that these final swats before her jeans deserted her made all the more of an impression.
''OW! Geez!'' She twisted around in an attempt to see if he was still using his hand - it seemed harder than ever! All she managed to see was Alex removing her first line of defense. He slid the blue fabric off her bottom, revealing her black lace panties.
Spank spank spank spank!!! Haaaaah, Robin thought.
''Haaaaaaah!'' Robin said. She had thought of her jeans as sort of insubstantial it but had been giving her more protection than she realized - now with nothing between his hand and her thin panties his every spank stung and stung to high heaven! Spank spank! spank spank! spank spank spank! spank spank spank!
''Owwwwooooooo? Oww? Ow, ow?'' In her mind Robin questioned if DH really needed to spank her quite this completely.
Picking up on this, her husband didn't hesitate. ''If you didn't want this spanking, naughty girl, you shouldn't have been buying books,'' he decreed, his logic unassailable. Like she hadn't thought of that! ''You know what buying books gets you - maybe next time you'll have an easier time deciding what you really want!''
''Grrrr,'' Robin grrrr'd - quietly.
Spank spank spank spank spank spank spank! spank spank spank spank spank spank spank!
''Ow oh ow oh ow ow ow!''
From long experience DH knew just what he was doing. Half or more of his spanks landed where her panties had ridden up due to her unflattering position. Not only did they sting all the worse, they were those same low spots Robin already knew she'd feel long afterward. How was she ever supposed to sit again?
Spank Ow Spank Ow Spank Ow Spank! On they went, like partners volleying on a tennis court - except that her soft bottom was no match for her husband's hard hand, and in this match she was being soundly beaten! And the sounds of that beating were Spank Ow Spank Ow Spank Ow Spank!
''Oh oh please,'' she protested - a lot of these spanks should count as panties-down! Not that they would, and not that she thought otherwise for even a moment. Nonetheless Robin felt that some sort of protest was called for. Spank spank spank - spank spank spank spank! spank! spank! spank! spank! spank! spank! spank! spank! Ooooo, DH knew just how to make her feel those! And Robin's poor little bottom did - each and every one!
Then quickly a lot more protest was very much called for!
''Oh no - really - no, please, no. Please?'' Her husband had stopped spanking long enough to pluck at the waistband of her panties - and she did not want them down! She grabbed them herself and held on tightly. ''Not those - they don't make a difference anyway,'' she claimed, fibbing slightly - though she was always surprised what a difference they did make. One by one, DH peeled her fingers from her black lace panties. And then they were gone.
Spank! spank! Her pale cheeks, only slightly colored by his gradual chastisement, were now fully under his hand - and eyes. Hold still! she told herself, wanting to minimize any jiggling or inappropriate exposure - try to hold still!
Spank! spank! Spank Spank! SPANK SPANK!
Maybe kicking and squirming was a better approach after all!
Spank! spank! Spank Spank! SPANK SPANK!
Suddenly he was in a hurry, a man with a mission. Now that he had her bare bottom in sight and squarely in his sights, he wanted it sore and stinging - both, a lot, and right now!
Spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank!Spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank!Spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank spank!
Couldn't DH hear her at all? Nothing seemed to slow him down! Just as she thought her poor little bottom would burst into flames, her husband's grip tightened! Her stomach followed suit as Robin recognized the meaning of this gesture!
''Oh no! No! No! OW! OH!'' His spanks rained down so much harder without slowing down at all. Her kicking and struggles became furious, but the harder she fought, the harder he spanked!
Spank! Spank!
SPANK! SPANK!
Spank! Spank!
SPANK! SPANK!
''OW OH OH OH OW OH OH!'' she cried. When, oh when, would this be over? And then, with frightening abruptness, it was!
''Now, naughty girl, it's time we took care of this buying books,'' DH pronounced.
Oh no! The bathbrush - whack whack whack whack whack whack whack! By the time she realized what was about to happen her bathbrush spanking was already well underway! Instantly the warmth of his hand was replaced by the sting of the bathbrush's wood. Oooo, did that hurt! Robin could never remember quite how much until she was feeling it - but as soon as she felt it she could remember - remember all too well!
whack whack whack whack whack whack whack!
''No, no - stop! Enough! I'll be good! I promise! Oh owwwwww...''
''Robin Michelle! Your buying books? This is most certainly NOT enough, except that it's enough out of you. Now hold still. You know you've earned this - and more. If you're good you'll get a lot less of the ''more.''''
whack whack whack whack whack whack whack!
Try as he might to be ''fair,'' when it came to buying books her husband was strict. That bathbrush HURT!
whack whack whack whack whack whack whack!
''No, no, not more - please, not more. Ow oh ow oh ow...''
whack whack whack whack whack whack whack!
''No - no please! I'll be good! I've learned my lesson - I have!'' As well she may have - her usually pale cheeks shone from the bathbrush's harsh wood.
''Then hold still, , so I can finish.'' And finish he did. With a flurry of whack-whack-whack's he made sure she'd have no place to sit, not for a good long time. Then the hardest yet, right in the center - whack whack whack whack whack whack! Even as Robin recognized these as his final spanks she could take no relief as the barrage drove her past all limits of ''taking it.''
''Whaaa - aaa - ow - oooo - ooo - ooo - ooo - NO!''
''Okay, Robin. Okay, . Breathe. Now breathe...'' DH encouraged. As slowly as it had begun it just as suddenly ended. Slowly Robin calmed down and her breathing did steady a bit.
''Now, young lady - no more buying books - understood?'' Somehow Robin nodded her acquiescence. And as she returned the bathbrush to bedside table, she never wanted to have anything to do with buying books, the bathbrush, or even her husband sitting on the bed - ever, ever again!
--
Matt Anglen - 2004
--

Sex Talk with the Kids

Before I get to the main, here's an update:

Work is still horrible. Still no end in sight (there's a big box of paperwork and my work computer sitting in the kitchen to prove this). I like the manager where I work, I think he's basically a good guy, but he's pretty clearly in over his head -- and the VP has gotten wise. Not sure what the future will bring...

DH and I are getting along, fitting sex in here and there, connecting. Trying to get him to read Tantric Secrets for Men (I had to read it first). Have to get a book cover so he can read it in public (while travelling) without embarrassment -- his request.

Spending a quiet, lazy day home. It's been raining constantly the last 2 days with more to come. We're nowhere near the Gulf Coast but Ike is definitely affecting our weather. What a mess down there. I hope any readers from there are safe and sound and their homes are okay. My sister-in-law and her family live in Houston -- they evacuated.

****************************************************************************

So, to my main topic ---

I have 2 teens, a girl and a boy. And sex-related discussions do occur -- I think I'd be worried if they didn't. General discussions started when my daughter was in 5th grade and had her first sex ed class. The school arranges for the students to attend a special class at the local college health center. They had a meeting for the parents first so we'd know what our children would learn. One thing I really like about the program is that for the basics the boys and girls are together -- learning what both genders experience in puberty. I know some parents were shocked but I think it's great -- removes some of the mystery and ignorance.

We've talked not about how to have sex, but about emotions and consequences and safety. I've told them more than once that I made it through high school without drinking, smoking, drugs or sex and still had a great time, probably a better time than some of the kids I knew who did those things. I never had to worry that someone was going to catch me, that I'd get pregnant, drive drunk, or any of the other things that I saw happen to several students.

I've talked specifically to my daughter about waiting for a man who wants to have sex with her because she's special and he wants to make her feel good, not just take his pleasure. My first time was good, precisely because my boyfriend didn't force anything, helping me relax and pleasuring me until I was ready -- and I enjoyed it. I've heard enough horror stories about miserable first times that I'd rather my daughter didn't have to experience that.

My son gets talks about being responsible and not using a girl just for sex (unless of course, that's what she wants). About condoms and birth control and never to assume a girl is on birth control or disease free just because she says she is.

So what brings this on? A couple discussion with my kids this past week. Last weekend we went to a bookstore (OC needed books for school). Bookophile/readaholic that I am, a bookstore is a dangerous place but I was determined to buy only one book (Tantric Secrets...). So I separate from the kids and head to the Love and Sexuality section, where of course they had several books cover facing out with suggestive pictures. This is where MC found me and started exclaiming that I was in the "dirty book" section. I'm sure I rolled my eyes, looked at him and stated that there is nothing dirty about love and relationships. He just kept repeating "dirty books." Jeeeesh.

We head home. I'm working on my computer, having difficulty figuring something out, when MC enters my room on his way to the laundry room. He offered to help, but since spanking blogs were up, I told him no. His response -- "Why? Is it something inappropriate?" If you could just hear how he says this... Then he notices the tantric secrets book on the bed and starts in on the "dirty book" thing again. Try to tell him again that there is nothing dirty about sex. He stops, then brings up an incident from his sex ed class last year when a fellow student asked the teacher why men like porn but women don't. I stood there for a minute, trying desperately to think how I was going to answer this... Then finally said, seriously, that many women like porn, too, although not necessarily the same type that men like, that we often like something a little more erotic. He got this look on his face and turned to leave the room, shaking his head as he walked out.

I shared all this with DH later on a trip to the store and he got all weirded out that our son would come to me to talk about sex instead of to him. I didn't know what to say. Finally I said that I didn't start this, MC did, and if he's comfortable enough to come and talk to me, I'm not going to turn him away. Sigh.... DH can be a little uptight...

Later, OC came into my room and I related the MC porn question to her. Her response? Well, of course women don't like porn. We're not as sexual and we're not turned on visually. I stared at her, dumbfounded, thinking, "where have I gone wrong?" Then I looked at her and stated seriously that she was wrong, that that is what society and religions have conditioned women to believe but that is not the truth. Now it was her turn to look dumbfounded. I don't think anything else was said, and she left the room.

Talking to MC later about his dads reaction, he stated that he was more comfortable coming to me because I actually answer him (apparently DH just repeats how he needs to be careful and use condoms) and because he finds it helpful and interesting to get a woman's opinion. He's realized that what guys think girls want is not necessarily correct. Smart boy :D

So that pretty much covers the highlights of last week....

So, doing nothing much today. DH gets home late tonight, so he's not here to get me up and doing things. House cleaners were here yesterday, so there are no household chores except laundry. Working on bills and miscellaneous paperwork. Do have to go out an run a few errands -- stop by the bank, get OC some books for school.

Saw Google now has a reader -- spent some time last night adding feeds to that. Saw there is another feed reader in the Blogger dashboard -- imported the feeds from the Google reader to that as well. Unfortunately, not all the blog feeds I've previously subscribed to were picked up -- not sure why -- I'll have to keep trying :)

Killing time, I typed spanking into the Yahoo! search bar. Haven't done this in a while and this seemed like a perfect opportunity.

Wikipedia has some interesting entries, chiefly:

• Erotic Spanking
• Spanking Art Wiki

Going to each one of these leads to even more. I spent an enjoyable time just jumping from site to site, reading, reviewing, checking out even more links.

Sadly, this is the closest I've been getting lately to anything spanking related.

As mentioned before, DH and I are out of sync. We've exchanged a few emails, trying to sort it out -- we tend to communicate better when there's a little bit of space and time.

Basically, he thinks I don't find him satisfying and am pulling away, that I want more than he is willing or capable of giving. So not true. I think it's pretty clear from what I've written here that I find DH eminently satisfying, in and out of bed. Sure, sometimes I wish we would try some new or different things, mix things up a bit -- and not always at my direction. Sometimes we have disagreements, but we try to work them out civilly instead of meanly. I'm not forgetting what happened back in February, but there hasn't been an similar incident since and DH does seem to be working on his anger issues.

I fully admit there's been some withdrawing, but it's only because I'm so exhausted and stressed from work. I'm still working 9-10 hour days + several hours on the weekend and I still can't seem to get caught up -- in fact, things just seem to get worst. Ever get so stressed and worn out that you know you are on the edge, that it wouldn't take much to push you right over? Well, that's where I've been for the last couple of months. Only DH doesn't like to hear about it or see any sort of emotional outburst. So I hold it all in, but it's simmering just below the surface. And the only way to keep it from erupting is to hold myself back, keep myself a little separate. Sometimes I'm so fragile that I know that the slightest bit of TLC from him will open the floodgates. So I pull away. But I don't push him away when he approaches me -- at least I don't think I do...

Anyway, he gets home tonight. Guess we'll see how things stand then...

Cucumber

DH is off again. Mexico again.

YC went to a friend's house to play yesterday and came home with a cucumber.

Can you guess DH's reaction?

Uh huh, yep, you got it. He brought it upstairs and told me that while he was gone, I could use the cucumber, to, you know...

I told him that if I used that, I wouldn't want him -- it's about 12 inches long and about as big around as a soda can.

His response -- I could only use half of it, the rest was handle.

*shaking head*

Happy Labor Day

From the lack of activity on this blog, you're probably wondering if I'm even still around...

I am alive, if not exactly well. Not ill, just worn out from work (still hell on earth) and all that exhaustion and stress means not much is happening between DH and me. At least nothing fun and exciting or that's noteworthy. Haven't even been getting online to read other blogs -- a) too exhausted, b) it's too depressing to read about others who are doing well and having fun.

Take this weekend -- 3 days off from work for me and DH (although I did bring a box of home, planning to spend some time on catch up) and 3 days off school for the kids (school started on the 25th). Saturday: got up, did chores, napped while DH and the two older children went to a major league baseball game ("our" team lost), got up, showered, had YC shower, took YC out in DH's convertible to return library books and get a treat from Dairy Queen. DH came home from the game, we had dinner, cuddled a bit while watching TV --- and he fell asleep. No fun Saturday.

Sunday -- did manage to get in a quickie :D Enjoyed it, even without any spanking to speak of. Well, there was a little spanking -- afterwards. DH got it into his head that I hadn't been completely truthful about something. I thought something was done, apparently it wasn't completely, he noticed, pulled out the paddle and lit into me -- hard. Of course, we're both laughing the whole time -- he's spanking, I'm wiggling, giggling and exclaiming "Ow! Ouch! That hurts!" 'til I couldn't take anymore and rolled away. He stopped. I rolled back (so I could get up) and he started in again, saying, "That's not enough, not yet." A few more hard, painful spanks and I moved completely out of his way and got up. Sheeesh. It's been so long that my butt was incredibly sensitive -- lost any toughening up it might have developed.

Spent the rest of the day on chores -- laundry, housecleaning, shopping. Of course, while I did the last, DH napped. We did go out, saw "Tropic Thunder." Not sure how I feel about the movie. It had some very funny parts, but I felt the profanity became excessive at times. I'm not a prude, I swear (lately a lot, what with the way work is), but still.... It's like some of the characters only knew one work -- fuck. And every other word was that, or some version of it. After the movie, we grabbed a bite to eat, had a couple of drinks, then headed home. Because DH napped, he was full of energy, but I'd been up since before 9 am, doing chores and all, and now it was after 1 am... Guess what, I was too tired for anything (see what I mean about being out of sync?), so we cuddled and went to sleep.

Now it's Monday -- before I even woke up, YC was in our bed, snuggling with DH. And she didn't want to leave.... So, once again, nothin' happening here. I got up, got dressed and headed downstairs to work on brunch and finish the laundry. Now it's the afternoon. I should be tackling the box of work I brought home, should be vacuuming, cleaning, etc., but I'd really just like to take a nap. But if I sleep now, I'll have difficulties tonight and it's back to hell, uhhh, work tomorrow morning. There was mention of showering and some fun before bed tonight. Yeah, ok, right, given the way things have been going, I'm not holding my breath.

I hope everyone else has had a good weekend, holiday or not.

A little clean up...

While on hold with the IRS for 50+ minutes plus another 15 or so with a rep, I pulled up this blog and started working through my "blogs I like" list.

Pretty quickly became clear that some some links needed removed, some updated and some added. I was very sad to see that Annie's Blog (spankinggoodblog.blogspot) was completely gone, as was Everything Goes (everythinggose.blogspot). I hope Annie and Robert and Griz and Good Girl are all ok -- I knew they hadn't posted in a while, but still...

I also deleted a few others where there has been no posting for at least the last few months -- I still have them on my feeds list so if they come back, I'll relist them.

I added a few that I've been trying to keep up with:

• Hermione's Heart
• LA Kink
• Just My Random Perverted Thoughts
• A Taste of the Birch
• Domestic Discipline Dreams
• Love Boudoir

I'll slowly keep adding as I get the time (I've got several more on my feeds list). They run the gamut from vanilla to hardcore kink, fantasy to reality, fun to discipline... As eclectic as I am :)

If you ever notice that a link's no longer working, please let me know.

If anyone has any recommendations, I'd love to hear them.

Is it Friday yet?

I ask because I haven't had a day off work since Sunday 27 July. And they've almost all been extra long days. I'm exhausted. But it looks like we may be past the major, work-halting problems, so after tomorrow I hopefully will no longer have to arrive early and stay late. VP has been at our facility all week and has more than once expressed his gratitude for all my hard work. He's granted me a couple extra days off -- and I'm hopeful all my hard work will have a positive effect on my review and raise next year.

Anyway, what with all the crazy work hours, there has been absolutely nothing 'fun' going on here -- not since the 28th (I started to write it down and hope to someday finish and post -- it was pretty darn close to perfect). We've gone from 3 to 4 times a week to once every ten days or so.... Ugh. If DH made a move, I wouldn't resist, but I don't know how actively involved I'd be. It's 8:3o and it's all I can do to keep my eyes open now...

Don't know if you've noticed but I've signed onto Twitter and have added it to the right hand column. I may not have time and energy to get a full post on here regularly, but it's easy to find a few moments here and there to "twitter."

Am now waiting for DH to get home with cooking oil so OC can make the brownies we're all craving -- may not be able to stay awake :/ Oh well.

Tonight, Tonight...

I'm writing this while I finish up with dinner (I know you're not supposed to work on other things while eating, but my time is such a premium right now, I have to multi-task).

Anyway, next up is a shower and maybe some work (I did bring my work computer home). But a shower is a must.

Why, you ask. Because DH is heading to Mexico tomorrow and won't be back to Friday, just in time for me to have to work all weekend on the big work project. He called me at work, asking if my period was over because he's leaving and wants to make sure there's spanking and sex before he leaves -- you know, to tide us over. He also suggested that to help me get in the mood, I turn my cell phone to vibrate then put it in my panties so every time he'd call I'd get a treat. Yeah, right -- cell phone's a little too bulky for that :)

So, this is just a quick post. Hopefully I will have something more exciting to write about later -- you know, when I have more time.

padme

Don't know if you read Journey to the Darkside by padme and Master Anakin, but they can use all the loving, supportive, and understanding thoughts you can send their way.

Padme had shared recently that she was pregnant. Sadly, today she suffered a miscarriage. Both are in a lot of pain and will be taking a break from blogging until they are up to it again.

I had recently joined Twitter, after seeing it on their blog, and had been 'following' padme. With all the work-related craziness, it was the closest I was getting to reading any blogs, let along posting to mine. So when I saw today that she was feeling bad enough to head to the emergency room, I worried... First thing I did when I got a chance to log on tonight was to check their blog for any updates... my heartaches for them. I can't imagine what they are going through...

I had other, light hearted things to post today, but this is more important.

A Spanking... Finally

I got a spanking! *happy singsong* And incredible scream-inducing sex...

Desperately in need of a good spanking, and waiting fruitlessly for DH to just take control, I decided I needed to plant the idea...

So, Tuesday while at work I sent DH a little email message, with 'Is it a date?' as the subject:

I've heard that a good sound spanking followed by some wild monkey sex can do wonders for relieving stress... *wink*

What do you say? Maybe some night this week? I've got a huge load of stress that needs relieving... *big grin*

DH: Any time just let me know you know the trick.

Me: So... If I come home, shower and set out some toys, you'll get the message?

And I mean a 'real' spanking, where I'm not doing anything else (you know what I mean *raised eyebrows*) but getting a hot red butt... You know I'll pleasure you anyway you want after...

Last night I came home and about 9 I hopped into the shower. It's been horribly hot and humid lately and I've been spending a lot of time out on the warehouse floor -- which is not air conditioned. Nasty, sweaty, humid, hot. Yeccchhh.

Anyway, while showering, DH came in and asked if this was the night. I kinda pushed it back at him, seeing as how he's the one expending the most energy... We decided it was the night. I finished showering and while DH showered I got ready -- black see-through nightie, black lace panties, and black stilettos (every time I wear them it gets easier to walk). I got out the new black leather paddle, the crop and the red rubber flogger; the massage oil and the flavored edible oil. By the time he came out, I was reclining on the bed -- trying to look enticing.

Must have worked *big grin*

DH got on the bed and pulled me close for snuggling, caressing and kissing. I was curled up with my head on his shoulder and he could just barely reach my bottom, but still he managed to get some good spanks in. We talked a little about what I wanted the spanking to be like -- I know I've mentioned before how heavy-handed DH can be, and that was not what I wanted for stress relief. He tried to pull his 'I'm in charge here' stuff with me, but I managed to get him to listen.

After awhile, I turned around so my head was down by his knees, putting my backside more in reach. I wanted to keep all of this relaxed and comfortable. I used sounds and words to let DH know the spanks that felt just right and those which were too much. Also made suggestions about his technique -- to us medium strength, quicker spanks instead of the hard, spaced apart ones he usually does. Most of this was with his hands -- my favorite implement :D I didn't completely ignore him, either.

Eventually, DH decided he wanted me standing, bent over the edge of the bed. I slid off my side, then minced around to the other side, hips swaying (gotta love how stilettos force you to walk sexy). Now he started to use the paddle and the crop more, eventually sliding my panties off. He only used the flogger a little bit, basically to caress my body, not flog it. Felt lovely. I had no concept of passing time... I could feel my bottom heating up and getting tender. DH would stop to rub and squeeze with his hands, causing other areas to heat up too. He also slid off his pajama bottoms so he could rub himself against my heated bottom, oiling me, too.

Then he had me get back on the bed, lying on my back. After rubbing me with KY Intrigue (and I coated him), he went down on me... working me with lips and tongue, fingers thrusting inside. So lost in how good it felt... Squeezing and stroking him... He stroked my g-spot, over and over, while licking my clit, until I came, squirting, feeling my juices on his hand and arm, on my thighs as he continued to stroke me. He slowed, then sat up and turned to me -- his face was so wet.

But he wasn't done with me yet. He tucked his left arm under my shoulders, bringing his hand to my breast. And with his right hand, he continued to rub my clit, until I came again, moaning.

Finally, the tremors eased, my breathing slowed, and he had me bending over the bed again -- the red and the heat had faded. Some more spanking, then I was on my knees in front of him, using the edible oil, licking and sucking, trying to give him pleasure like he'd given me...

Up on the bed, all fours, pillow clutched in my arms, ready for smothering my cries. He slid in -- I was so wet there was no resistance... I came again, more than once... he spanked me still, with his hands, as he thrust... Then I felt the oil, pouring out of the bottle to coat my bottom again, slipping down the crack, his hands rubbing it onto my cheeks and into my crack and opening, pausing to coat his cock... The stretching as he entered, slowly, taking his time so I would feel more pleasure than pain (he's good at reading me), until he could feel me relax... thrusting, bringing me to screaming orgasm (I almost forgot to use the pillow to muffle my cries)... and again... until he came, thrusting as deep into me as possible... I collapsed on the bed...

Once I returned to awareness, I looked at the clock. We were deeply involved with one another for over an hour. Wow.

Then I got up, slipped off the stilettos, slipped on the moisturizing socks, and slipped of the lingerie and climbed in the bed.

And had the best sleep I'd had in days!! Without pain relievers or sleeping aids. Woke up this morning, sat up, and felt a lovely reminder of last night's fun. Checking in the mirror, no marks -- but sometimes they take a few days to show up (sometimes I forget and then I catch a glimpse and it's like 'OMG, where the hell did that come from?!'). And I have felt relaxed and energized and wonderful all day. Even while out in the over 80 degree warehouse for multiple hours...

Wonder how long this will last...

Dreams

Somewhat logically following on my post about desperately needing a spanking...

Last night I dreamt of being spanked by DH. It was not a clear dream, but I "remember" getting into position (all 4s) on the bed and hearing him slide his belt out his pants and wondering if that was really what he was going to use...

And then I woke up. It stormed at 5am here and the noise of it pushed me out of sleep. Darn it.

Not the first time I've had a spanking dream, just the second -- that I remember.

First time was about a month ago, the last time DH was on a business trip. That dream falls into the category of lucid dreaming. It was crystal clear, everything exactly as in real life. I was in my robe, so desperate for a spanking that I was going to self-spank. I was digging through DH's bedside table, looking for an implement, when MC came into my room. I hurriedly shut the drawer and hid the bath brush behind my back (ironic that I would choose the bath brush in my dream when I really dislike it -- but it does have a long handle, ideal for self-spanking). While backing into the bath room, I tried to get MC to leave so I could get to it... And it stops there.

I think it's like when you're really craving a certain food and there's none around... it becomes the one thing you absolutely can't stop thinking about, and the needing and the wanting becomes all consuming...

Well, I've got to get going and pick up DH from the airport. Will we have any fun tonight? No idea...

I Need....

A Spanking!!!!

Seriously. I've been so out of it this week and have not at all been a 'good' girl. Too bad DH's not more willing to try a little spanking discipline...

He's gone this week and not checking up on me so I haven't been exercising, haven't been making wise food choices, and have been staying up waaaaaaay too late.

I've got a good list of excuses... Wanna hear?

• DH isn't here to keep me company, so I get lost in the TV, computer, or reading
• Work is too, too stressful right now and how do I react to stress -- overeating, turning couch potato, and undersleeping
• OC is off on her French adventure, so she's not here to help out with things -- so more for me to do after an extra-long stressful day of work
• Money is tight
• Nothing is working as a motivator right now
• Work, work, work -- VP keeps giving me more and more to do with the system change, yet I still have all my regular responsibilities...
• I'm not a morning person so getting up early enough to exercise before work doesn't work for me, but then I'm tired after work, plus there's chores to do, kids to feed...

Oh, alright, so they're pretty lame excuses.

DH just doesn't get it. When I dropped him off at the airport Monday, he told me I should pick up a salad on the way to work to eat for lunch. So what did I do -- bought and ate a salad for lunch. He gave me a specific instruction and I followed it.

Tried to suggest that he could find ways to reward me for exercising and dieting... Him: "Why is everything about sex with you?" aaaaaagggggghhhhh! Yes, sexual rewards would be nice, and serious discipline spankings could help, but not everything has to be sexual. Sheeeeesh. You'd think that's all I think about (ok, it's often on my mind, but really...). Doesn't help that he's a classic 'saboteur' when it comes to me trying to improve my health.

What we need is some time alone, when we're not worn out and stressed by work, etc. to really talk - well, me to talk and try to explain what I need so he'll understand and be able to provide. Should it ever happen, I'll let you know.

One more day of work this week and then it's the weekend. I am not bringing work home, I am not bringing work home (maybe if I repeat this enough...)

I'll try to get some posts up next week, but the last 2 weeks of this month and the first 2 of August are going to be crazy at work as we finally go through the system change. I'll be on the computer non-stop at work, so probably will be too burnt out by the time I get home to even read blogs, let alone add to mine. Please send good thoughts to help me survive.

So...

DH is off to Mexico this week, the guests are on their way back to France, and OC is on her way to France with them. Yep, I'm sending my baby off to France for 2 weeks. I'm praying for her safety and am sure she'll have a good time. The family she's staying with lives northwest of Paris, but they'll be spending about a week in the south of France (on the Med) with maybe a day in Spain. They've got lots of fun activities planned for her.

It's just the 3 of us 'til Saturday -- me, MC, and YC. Big, empty house. Big, empty bed. *sigh*

Hope everyone had a great weekend. I was exhausted, but since it was a holiday weekend, with company, no lazing about allowed. Off to the festival we all went. DH, YC and I defended our space while the older kids scattered. We ate, sat in the sun, listened to music (can't tell you who 'cuz if you search them you'd find out where I live *grin*). The crowd swelled to over 40,000. It was packed. The weather was perfect -- warm with a slight breeze, not a cloud in the sky.

And, finally, fireworks. I love fireworks! They did a pretty good job with the accompanying music (except for some screaming thing by AC/DC). Even included the theme from Indiana Jones -- the crowd liked that. At one point there was a pause. People thought the show was over. This voice booms out, "Over? Did you say 'over'? It's not over 'til I say it's over!" And then the finale. Loved the comment -- it got a great laugh.

Fireworks on the 4th of July always make me think of John Adams. He'd written a letter to his wife on July 3rd 1776, the day after the Continental Congress resolved on 2 July 1776 "That these United Colonies are, and of right, ought to be, Free and Independent States." (Explains why he states July 2nd should be celebrated instead of the 4th, which is when the final version of the Declaration was approved and signed). Here's part of the letter (the important part *grin*):

...The Second Day of July 1776, will be the most memorable Epocha, in the History of America.— I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated, by succeeding Generations, as the great anniversary Festival. It ought to be commemorated, as the Day of Deliverance by solemn Acts of Devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, with Shews, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more.

You will think me transported with Enthusiasm but I am not.—I am well aware of the Toil and Blood and Treasure, that it will cost Us to maintain this Declaration, and support and defend these States.—Yet through all the Gloom I can see the Rays of ravishing Light and Glory. I can see that the End is more than worth all the Means. And that Posterity will tryumph in that Days Transaction, even altho We should rue it, which I trust in God We shall not.

And celebrate we do with all of the above -- with great enthusiasm.

DH and I are maybe back on track... 3 times in less than 48 hours (you know what I mean *wink*). Not bad for us old folks *grin*. Of course, none of those 3 times included much in the way of spanking (although I got to enjoy some very nice oral last night *big grin*). Gotta get DH out of his rut of only spanking me while I'm pleasuring him orally -- neither of us can really focus on the spanking in that position...

I did get a bit of a spanking after my shower last night. I'm so very fair that I don't dare go out in the sun without a heavy coating of the highest SPF I can find. But I really don't want to be so pale I glow in the dark so I've been trying a sunless tanning lotion. Only problem is I can't reach my upper and middle back -- at least not well enough to evenly spread lotion. So I asked DH to help me out *rolling eyes*. Uh huh. Helped he did -- helped himself to my butt! I was still damp from the shower and the lotion I'd already applied, plus I'd already given him the lotion he was supposed to apply to my BACK, so it was a stingy hand spanking. SPANK, rub, SPANK, rub... This repeated 'til my backside was a nice bright pink all over (and the lotion well rubbed in). He had me kicking up my feet and squealing *grin*. When he was satisfied with the spanking, he finally applied the lotion to my back.

Happy 4th!!

Hope all my American spanko friends have a fantastic 4th of July -- with plenty of Stars and Stripes (seeing and receiving, respectively).

My Tattoo

Well, I still don't have any really good pictures. DH finally agreed to take a picture, but only with his iPhone...

So here are the best I have, plus the design I drew that it was based on.

This was not a spur of the moment decision -- nor a mid-life crisis one (I prefer to think of it as an acceptance and awakening of who I am). I'd thought about getting a tattoo many years ago (college) but never did (multiple reasons) and off and on over the years, but once married and with kids I wasn't sure what DH would think. Then, surprise, he brought it up. He'd always wanted a tattoo but had never gotten one (in his case, it goes along with the sportscar and motorcycle -- mid-life crisis, oh yeah). So, he just went off one day and came home with an eagle head on his right arm at the shoulder. I started looking for a design I liked, and found a lot -- it can be hard to choose just one.

Finally decided a buttefly would be best -- feminine, delicate but strong, representative of change, beauty... Looked at hundreds of designs until I found one somewhat like what I wanted -- a side view, facing right, not too life-like. Only it still wasn't exactly right, so I hand drew my own design taking the picture I'd found as a guide. I rounded out some angles, added some more curves, changed the colors (green, blue, pink -- if you can't tell from the pics). I tried about 4 different color combinations before I found the one I used. I even visited different tattoo parlors to check things out. Not spur of the moment at all.

DH went to the artist who'd done his and made an appointment for the following Saturday -- the day before our 15th anniversary. He got another tattoo, on his left arm at the shoulder -- the Chinese character for eagle. He went first, while I sat and tried to relax, reading.

Then it was my turn. I really didn't know what to expect. Some pain, obviously, but beyond that, not a clue. I pulled the back of my t-shirt over my head, keeping my front covered and pulled down the bra strap. The artist and I discussed colors and placement -- asking DH's opinion in the process (not a lot of help).

And she began.

At first, I felt quite a bit of pain, but it quickly changed to just a slight pressure with burning in the spot she was working on. And my whole body felt warm. Wasn't expecting that. I didn't find it difficult at all to hold still or to stay in position. I think it took about half an hour to be completed -- I wasn't really aware of time and didn't keep track of it. I was bandaged and off we went.

I had no problems during healing at all -- no bleeding, no scabbing, no itching, very little pain and only when accidently scrubbed in the shower.

I think it turned out great and I still like catching glimpses of it in the mirror when I'm dressing and undressing. DH is not used to it -- he told me he feels like he's having sex with some other woman when he looks at my back and sees it there (thinking this may play into the recent dry spell...).

Back to our trip... Athens, Greece

We had decided when planning the trip that Shore Excursions were going to be way too expensive for the whole family so we would just make our own way around at the stops. After exiting the ship, we found a taxi and a driver who would spend 3 hours taking us around to major sites: the Temple of Zeus, Hadrian’s Gate, Olympic Stadium, Acropolis, Presidential Palace. The weather was perfect again – clear blue skies, not too hot.

First stop was the Temple of Zeus, just past Hadrian’s Gate. The few remaining columns were impressive – can’t even begin to imagine what it would have been like when it wasn’t a ruin. From the Temple we could clearly see the Acropolis. Somehow I had never realized it was up on a mount…

But before heading up to the Acropolis, we stopped at the stadium that was the site of the first modern Olympic Games. Compared to the stadiums we’re used to seeing, it was so small. When you think that the games are still going strong after a century… pretty darn awe inspiring.

On to the Acropolis –

Wow. So stunning. Mind-boggling to realize that all this was built without electricity, computers, the machines we have today. It’s all up on a rocky hill – it was hot the day we were there, and to think about hauling all those large stones up the hill and then building with them… Even YC understood how hard it must have been.

And the modern-day upkeep… Apparently, all the buildings have been completely disassembled and are now being reassembled to correct errors of past restoration attempts. There are piles of stones everywhere, pieces of buildings and statuary – they are trying to match the stones up with the buildings so the restoration will be as accurate as possible.

The view from the Acropolis – I think we could see all of Athens, a huge sprawl in all directions. Of course we could see Hadrian’s Gate and the Temple of Zeus, but we could also see the Olympic Stadium, the Agora, the Forum, the Tower of the Winds… So many things to see, too little time.

After the Acropolis, we watched the changing of the guard at the Presidential Palace – a very ritualized process.

And then it was back to the ship. Hiring the driver was truly the best way to see Athens in the short time we had.

Have to share this – While we were all crammed into the car, YC, whose mind processes are usually easy to follow, asked, out of the blue, “Do ants have brains?” We all just looked her. No idea where that came from… And if you asked her what was the best thing she saw, she’d answer that it was the dogs everywhere.

Once back on the ship, we headed up to play miniature golf before dinner. We all took one round (DH won and gloated), then headed to the Solarium for snacks since dinner wasn’t ‘til 9pm. YC wanted to hang out in the kids’ area – it was Pirate Night (I have some cute pics of her as a pirate princess). OC and MC took off to play games. They were finally acclimated to the ship and enjoying their freedom. DH and I headed to the cabin to relax for a while.

YC wanted to stay in the kids area ‘til it closed, so the rest of us headed to the fancy dining room for dinner. It wasn’t formal night, so no dressing up was required. Our table partners were a couple from Sweden, a couple from New Orleans, and sisters from South Africa. At 10, DH went to get YC. At first she didn’t want to eat anything, but the wait staff treated her like a little princess and had her trying all sorts of things. All 3 kids liked being waited upon so we ate in the dining room a few more times while on the trip.

DH and I decided to skip the lounge and drinks after dinner and went back to our cabin for some ‘play’ time, after making sure the kids were settled in for the night. DH got out the Shunga kit and the new paddle. It’s leather with “fur” on one side. I got lots of nice attention, with DH going down on me and working me over good with tongue and lips and fingers. And of course, he didn’t stop ‘til I came. Then DH had me assume his new favorite BJ + spanking position – on my belly, face off the edge of the bed. He gets two pleasures at once. For me, it’s okay, but it makes it hard for me to completely enjoy either act, plus I’m always worried I might hurt him involuntarily when I react to a hard spank.

Anyway, you know how this works for us by now – When he’s had enough oral attention, he likes to oil up my backside and rub against me ‘til he slides right in. Of course, I’m all hot and wet and slick from the earlier orgasm, the spanking, my own juices and the oil – I’m more than ready to feel his cock filling my pussy, stretching, pounding, thrusting; feeling him against my g-spot, my labia, and his balls hitting my clit. Really, with that kinda stimulation going on, how can I not come explosively?

After we were done, while I laid exhausted facedown on the bed, DH took pictures of me with his iPhone. But he never sends them to me and doesn’t keep them long. He doesn’t send them to me because he doesn’t want there to be any possibility that I might post them somewhere (uh, here); he doesn’t keep them long on his phone because so many people (co-workers, friends, our kids) like to look at the phone and he’s afraid someone might see them. I don’t even think he sends them to himself to keep on his laptop… If he does, I don’t know about it, nor do I have access to look…

Oh, and I had a very, very red bottom, from top to bottom and around the sides – he wielded that paddle most impressively.

All that activity made us hungry. Even though it was 1 a.m., there was still food in the Solarium, so off we went for a small snack before hitting the bed for sleep.

Yep, Athens, Greece – what a great day.

Catching up...

I've spent the last couple of hours doing some blog reading catch up... Some people have lots going on, others (like me) seem to be stuck in the doldrums.

Anyway, saw this quiz on quite a few blogs and thought I'd give it a go:

Your result for The What's your sexual style? Test...

TYPE M

You scored 92 imagination, 83 confidence, 29 dominance, and 42 generosity!

You are a KINKY, CONFIDENT, SUBMISSIVE lover who prefers to RECEIVE.

This means that:

You like relatively kinky sex, and you have the great imagination that will always keep your partner guessing and excited! There's no getting bored with you around, you could never settle for dull sex, you want something fun and new all the time. You aren't afraid to try out anything you hear about. You might just be an intelligent lover who needs to be mentally engaged, or perhaps you have some dirty dark secret kinky desires, but either way, you're never boring.

You are pretty confident in bed. This means that you know you can please your lover. Maybe you've read a lot of sex manuals, or have the experience from previous lovers, or just tend to be skilled at whatever you get your hands on, but you're good and you know it. You can really get results and know that you have pure talent, so you won't be hiding away shy, pretending to be all innocent. Your partners love your naughty self assurance, you don't hesitate and this makes you a sensational lover.

You tend to be submissive in bed, so you prefer to go along with what your lover likes rather than your own plans. You might like being ordered around and acting out a slave/master fantasy, or perhaps you just get turned on by being helpless and unable to move. Or maybe it's as simple as you lacking courage so prefering firm instructions in bed to make sure you are doing things right. Either way, you won't be dominating your lover anytime soon, and might prefer the missionary position to any others.

You would rather Receive than Give. This usually applies more to Oral sex than anything else, and other types of foreplay. This could be for a number of reasons. Maybe you are just very hooked on the sensation of orgasm, maybe you feel you deserve to be treated like a god/goddess, maybe you just aren't confident about your skills when it comes to returning the favour. Maybe you are lazy. Or maybe your partner loves to give and that suits you fine, so everyone is happy. Either way, remember to be a giver sometimes too, as long as your partner likes it.

WE SUGGEST YOU TRY:
Being Blindfolded and even tied up with scarves, and letting your partner tease, tickle and delight you, in the most tempting way. You are confident and imaginative enough to not mind them doing all sorts of fun things to you, surprises and frustratingly out of your reach pleasure. Just like back and enjoy, and maybe you can return the favour, maybe not.

Take The What's your sexual style? Test at HelloQuizzy

Yep, sounds like me

Now, if I could just get the sex...

Still off...

God, last weekend of June...

I just haven't been able (willing) to get on the computer, for any reason, after spending all day on it at work.

I've started a few things, written a few notes, but just can't seem to make the leap to posting. Haven't even been reading other blogs...

DH has been home non-stop, kids are home, we have guests, work is busy in prep for the system change, my ankle has good days and bad days...

And nothing, I mean NOTHING, at all juicy or sexy or spanky has been going on. Action is little and far apart... No real reason why (although I can make some educated guesses).

We still haven't fixed our Internet, so I still can't post pictures from home, and again, no desire to stop by the library to post, so still no pics of my tattoo, or our vacation, or anything I might like to share.

And seeing as it is now after 9:30 pm and I have work in the morning, this is all I have time and energy for...

Sorry...

Mid-week Blah

A few things --

Internet connection at home is still squirrelly, so haven't been able to do the posting I've wanted to. So I'm at the library again, but I left my notes in the car. Darn it.

Tried to take pics of my tattoo. Most were fuzzy. The few that were clear were off center. Gotta convice DH to take some pics (he knows I'll probably post them, so I'm not sure if he will). It's on my right shoulder blade so it's just too difficult to get the focus and angle right while the timer is counting down. Double darn. I do have the picture I drew that the tattoo was based on, but I want to wait till I have a picture of the actual tattoo to post with it. Can't have the kids do it as they don't know about it (they're all minors and we don't want to give them ideas) -- I do know at some point they will see it, especially since it is summer and I plan on getting some swimming in.

Mentioned way back on Earth Day how I fell off a sidewalk and badly sprained my right ankle (you've done that, right -- stepped on the edge with just enough foot hanging over that when you put all your weight on it, your ankle buckles and you fall, hard...). Anyway, what with it happening a week before vacation, I didn't manage to get to the doctor until this week (I tried 2 weeks ago, but the dr cancelled). Had 8 x-rays -- no apparent breaks, but way more swollen than it should be after 6 weeks. So have an appt with an orthopedist on Monday -- minimum is physical therapy, maximum is casting. We'll see. Could cause a lot of difficulties if I can't drive.

For all it being our anniversary, the weekend was quiet (including sexually -- but I'll try to post on that more later). And this week hasn't been any better -- darn NBA finals (Go Lakers!).

Will try to get some more exciting posts up later.

15 Years

Today is our 15th wedding anniversary. I don't think we ever really thought about whether or not we'd still be together all those years ago when we went to Las Vegas, 2-month-old daughter in tow, and stood before the marriage administrator and said "I do." It wasn't an elopement, but it definitely wasn't a wedding with all the attendant family, friends, and stress. I'm still happy that we did it that way.

The way things were just a few short months ago, reaching this milestone was in serious doubt. But we made it -- after lots of talking and working things through and just plain trying to make things better. Took a couple of month to get things back to 'normal'.

No big plans for today. We're starting out with the regular weekend activities -- house and yard work, shopping, errands -- but tonight we're planning on dinner out. DH mentioned he needs to go out by himself for awhile -- he's gotta go present shopping. No idea what he's thinking of getting me...

Not sure what to get him. Yesterday we went and got tattoos, which I paid for. I half-jokingly said that my paying for his tattoo was my gift to him... Maybe I'll look for something more... Hmmmmm... I'm not generally good at gift shopping so this will be a challenge...

There was a mention of enjoying the whirlpool tub this evening -- bubbles, candles, wine. Sounds lovely.

Of course, I'll be posting all about our evening...

Memorial Day Make Up Sex

Taking a break from the travelogue...

Obviously, in order to have make up sex, something must have happened to create a break that needed repaired.

And yes, something did happen... DH seriously misunderstood something I said and went off in a direction not even remotely related to what I had said. Totally different planets... I made my comment, what I thought was a basically positive comment ("You're the one who likes doing X, I do it so I can be with you") and he turned this into I don't trust him and I don't want to be with him... My response, as I was getting upset over this, was to turn away and say nothing. Inside, I'm fighting tears and the urge to turn to him and say, "What the hell!?!?" (Really did not help that I was PMSing). I don't think confronting him would have been any better than sitting there silently -- somehow I would still end up in trouble.

This was Saturday night. Sunday was spent with quiet tension, keeping out of each others way as much as possible. We did go see Indiana Jones -- pretty good and fun. Then he decided he wanted to talk, although he was not too believing when I kept repeating the one and only thing I had said (see above). He was insistent that I must have said something more. Honestly, I didn't. That sentence was the last thing I said before he went off on his tangent. I have no explanation for how he heard something so radically different from what I said. To say I was confused by his outburst is putting it mildly. But we talked, he listened, and ultimately believed me.

Monday morning, we slept in (yeah for holidays). DH scooted over to me, sliding an arm beneath my neck, and snuggled up to me. Not sure where this was going, I didn't resist but I didn't welcome him either. And he surprised me. You've probably gathered from this blog that DH is a butt man -- typically when he's in the mood, he heads straight for my butt and pussy, with very little attention spent anywhere else (I'm not complaining, just saying...). Instead of heading 'south', DH started by nuzzling, licking, nibbling and sucking on one breast while caressing the other. Heaven... Wasn't long 'til I was moaning and writhing. And this went on and on... DH not seeming to be in any sort of hurry to do anything else. When he did slide a hand down, I had to stop him and tell him that it was that time of the month (talk about rotten timing). Fortunately, that revelation didn't even slow DH down.

We kissed, we caressed, we stroked and rubbed. He was on top, I was on top. At one point, DH went for my neck, nibbling and sucking. (For your viewing pleasure, I've added a picture of my neck taken after -- I knew as seen as he started that I was going to be well-marked.) I was so in the moment, so aroused. I reached down and grabbed DH through his pants, rubbing and stroking, as he kept himself raised up off of me just enough. And then I had this incredible desire to feel him in my mouth, so I pushed him over and yanked his pants down. I couldn't get enough of licking and sucking -- he tasted and felt so good and so right, filling my mouth. And I made sure I was positioned so that DH's hands could easily reach my backside -- and reach he did.

Too soon, DH was pulling me up, rolling me over and kissing me, pressing me down into the bed. Again, I reached down, stroking and rubbing, until I couldn't stand it anymore and told him that I wanted to suck his cock some more. He looked at me like he couldn't believe what he was hearing (I may go down on him without him asking, but I rarely voice my intentions) and rolled onto his back. Just like before, while I attended to him orally, he paid attention to my bottom, stroking and spanking. Eventually, he pulled me up to kiss again and I couldn't stop myself from telling him to spank me, that I'd been naughty to be so distant and so cold and he needed to spank me to punish me. He didn't say anything, and I'm not sure about his expression, but he didn't refuse. He got off the bed, standing at the side and had me get in position. I was so gone, I'm not even sure what he used on me -- crop, paddle, hair brush -- other than his hand.

The spanking did not last long, although is was enough to add some lasting marks on my backside to go with the ones on my neck. Soon DH was oiling my bottom, making sure I was especially well oiled in preparation for what was coming up. DH wanted inside, and not in my mouth or pussy. He wanted to feel me tight around him as he fucked me hard and fast. I was so aroused that he didn't need to do anything other apply oil for me to be ready for him.

He entered slowly and steadily, rubbing and smacking my bottom all the while. Once in all the way, he grabbed my hips and began thrusting. My legs were spread wide, my arms grasping a pillow for me to moan into, and I moved back to meet him, matching his rhythm, until he was moving so fast and hard it was all I could to breathe as I buried my face into the pillow, crying out as I orgasmed. If someone had told me years ago that I could have such consuming, mind blowing orgasms from anal sex, I'd have tried it years ago, and certainly wouldn't have put DH off for as long as I did.

DH continued with his strong rapid thrusts. I could hear his breathing change and the little sounds he makes that let me know he is getting close. And then I felt it, felt him come, filling me. A few more thrusts, and then he was done.





I collapsed face down onto the bed while he cleaned up, eventually getting up and making my way into the bathroom. Where the first thing I saw was my neck. "DH!" "What?" "My neck!" "Oh" (in a shocked tone). I wore a light scarf around my neck all day Monday. Fortunately, Tuesday was cold enough that I could wear a turtleneck to work, but it was the scarf again on Wednesday. By Thursday, I'd had enough with the cover up attempts and with a little foundation and powder, they weren't that noticeable.


Oh, and my butt was well marked, too. My only concern was the massage therapist on Thursday, but the marks were down low enough that I don't think she could see anything (panties always stay on).

I don't like the upsets, but I love the wild and hot make up sex!

Sea Day

Since we are STILL having internet issues, I am sitting in the public library trying to get some posting done. I've tried everyday from home and everytime I try to do anything beyond the simple read a website, our connection crashes. We got a new modem but it looks like we also need a new router. DH is in Germany this week, so it'll probably be the weekend before we can get this resolved (I can buy the router, but I really don't know how to set it up and worry that I might make things worse). It's so frustrating!!!!

Other than that work is fine, weather is gorgeous, and school's almost out.

Took it easy, slept in until 10 am, missing breakfast. Checked my backside in the mirror; there were a few marks from the crop last night (no surprise).

We all had lunch together. YC’s mantra during the whole meal was basically, “swimming, swimming, swimming” so once we finished eating, we decided to give in. The weather was perfect – sunny and warm. Not too many people were out at the pool yet, so we were able to find enough lounges altogether. While DH and the kids played in the pool, I relaxed while reading and writing and resting. For a few hours.

And of course I ended up with a little sunburn – I’m so fair, no matter how much sun block I use, it’s pretty much inevitable. DH and the kids just tan.

Eventually, we’d had enough and went in.

YC wanted to spend some time in the kids’ area, so we dropped her off up there, picking her up later for dinner. She made a ‘magic’ wand, painted and covered in glitter. DH looked at it, swished it around, got that twinkle in his eye and made some comment about maybe he could try the wand on me. (never did happen – thank goodness).

Once we were sure the kids were settled in for the night, DH and I headed back up to the lounge. It was 70’s night and members of the crew put on a show as ABBA and the Village People – it’s a lot of fun. As ‘In the Navy’ was performed and I was singing along, the guy next to me turned to me and we were commenting on how could anyone have missed the theme of the Village People’s songs. We reminisced about school dances and roller-skating parties (anyone else remember those?) – too funny.

Eventually, I’d had enough (I can only take so much loud music and crowds), and with DH’s promise that he would be down in a few minutes, I headed off to our room. I changed into some of the new lingerie and waited for DH. And waited. And waited. While waiting, I watched the ship channel where they were showing (and re-showing) the video of 70’s night. About an hour and 2 times through the show later, DH finally shows up, chattering on about how much fun he had after I left… Way to kill the mood. So absolutely nothing happened that night – and he didn’t understand why.

Oh, well. C’est la vie.